A small quiz

Is my relationship over?

Is it over, or is this a hard season?

9 questions 2 minutes

A small stone bridge over a misty river at dawn, two paths parting on the far bank, soft watercolour illustration

Is it over, or is this a hard season?

Nobody on the internet can tell you to leave your relationship, and this quiz is not going to try. What it can do is help you tell the difference between a hard season and an ending, because from the inside those feel almost the same and both of them are heavy. Nine questions about ordinary life together. Answer them as things actually are this month, not as they were at the beginning or as you hope they will be.

2 minutes · 9 questions

the questions in this quiz

  1. When did the two of you last laugh together, properly?

    • This week
    • You would have to think about it. Recently enough
    • You cannot place it
    • You laugh, but not really with each other

  2. What happens in a disagreement now?

    • It gets loud or tense, and then it gets repaired
    • It goes round in a circle and stops from exhaustion
    • It does not happen. One of you goes quiet and it passes
    • You do not bother starting them anymore

  3. You hear him come through the front door. What happens in your chest?

    • Something lifts, even on a bad day
    • Nothing much either way
    • A quick assessment of what mood he is in
    • It sinks

  4. Is there still touch that is not functional?

    • Yes, easily and often
    • Less than there was, and you both notice
    • Rarely. It has become slightly awkward
    • No, and you have stopped reaching

  5. When something happens in your day, do you still tell him first?

    • Yes, without thinking about it
    • Usually, though you edit more than you used to
    • Sometimes. Often somebody else hears it first
    • No. He is a long way down the list now

  6. Have the two of you actually talked about what is wrong?

    • Yes, properly, and something shifted
    • Yes, and it did not go anywhere
    • In fragments. Never the whole thing
    • No, and you cannot imagine starting

  7. Picture the two of you in five years. What do you see?

    • Something you would want
    • A blur. You cannot get the picture to load
    • Exactly this, unchanged, and you feel tired
    • Yourself, somewhere else

  8. What do the people closest to you say?

    • Nothing worrying. They like the two of you together
    • That you seem stressed
    • They have stopped asking
    • They have started asking whether you are all right

  9. If a neutral stranger watched one ordinary week of your life together, what would they say?

    • Two people under pressure who are still on the same side
    • Two people who need to talk and have not
    • Two people living politely alongside each other
    • One person who has already left

The quiz itself runs in the browser. With scripts turned off you can still read every question here.

More quizzes all card meanings