Am I over him?
Not whether you still think about him, but what happens in you when you do.
Not whether you still think about him, but what happens in you when you do.
Everybody asks this question the same way, by counting how often he crosses their mind, and that is the least useful measure there is. People think about their first job and their old house too. The question that actually tells you something is what happens in you when he does turn up in your head: whether the day changes shape, whether you reach for the phone, whether the picture of him being fine is one you can hold. These nine questions look at that instead. Answer the true version rather than the version you have been telling people, because nothing here is going to judge you for it.
question 1 of 9
His name comes up. What happens in your body in the first second?
- A drop, and then it takes a while to come back up
- A jolt, then you are fine, and then you are not quite
- A small pull in one specific place, and then nothing
- Not much. It is a name you know well
the questions in this quiz
His name comes up. What happens in your body in the first second?
- A drop, and then it takes a while to come back up
- A jolt, then you are fine, and then you are not quite
- A small pull in one specific place, and then nothing
- Not much. It is a name you know well
You find out that he is doing well.
- It takes the afternoon off you
- Glad and stung, in that order, and the stung part lasts longer
- Glad, mostly, and a bit wistful about it
- Glad, the way you are glad about people you used to know
What do you do with the last conversation the two of you had?
- You still run it. You know the lines
- You run it less, and you still have a favorite part and a worst part
- You think about it when something reminds you, and not otherwise
- You would have to work to remember how it ended
Your phone, late at night.
- His name is still somewhere you can reach quickly
- You unmuted something once, to check
- You could look, and mostly you do not want to
- It is your phone. It has not been about him in a long time
Somebody new is interested in you.
- You compare, and the comparing takes over
- You are interested, and something is still holding a seat
- You are interested, and a small part of you is careful
- You are interested, and you are actually available for it
Picture him with somebody else on an ordinary Tuesday.
- You cannot stay in the picture
- You can look at it for a second, and then you put it down
- It is uncomfortable, and you can hold it
- It is his life, and looking at it does not move anything
What do you tell people about it now?
- You are still telling it, and the telling still has heat in it
- A shorter version, and one part of it still gets loud
- You tell it like something that happened to you
- It rarely comes up, and when it does you are quick and fair about it
Something good happens on a Wednesday afternoon.
- He is still the first person you want to tell
- He crosses your mind, and you tell somebody else
- You tell the people in your life, and he arrives afterward, briefly
- You tell whoever you want to tell, and he is not in the room at all
He writes tonight, a good message. What actually happens in you?
- Everything. The whole evening changes shape
- A lift you would recognize, and then a very long think
- Interest, and a clear sense of what you would not go back to
- Curiosity, a reply that fits on one screen, and your evening carries on
The quiz itself runs in the browser. With scripts turned off you can still read every question here.