Is he thinking about me?

The honest answer to this one is short. Nobody can tell you, and a card cannot look across a city into somebody’s afternoon.

The longer answer is more useful, and it starts with the fact that this question tends to arrive at the same hour every day, which is worth knowing, because that hour is information about you and about the habit the two of you had.

Is he thinking about me right now?

Almost certainly he is doing something ordinary, the way you were before the question arrived. That is not a cold answer, it is just what most hours are made of, for everybody.

What the draw below can do is read the pull itself: how long it has been going on, what it costs you in a day, and what would put a little air back into the afternoon. Three cards rather than ten, because this question does not need a chart, and because a short honest reading is easier to carry around for the rest of the day.

The line we will not cross

You will find sites that answer this with a percentage. We think that is a small cruelty dressed as a service, because the number is invented and the hope it starts is real.

So the ceiling stays where it is. The cards can see your side of this, and your side is genuinely readable, because it is made of things you have done and things you keep almost doing. His side is his, and the only reliable route to it has never been a spread.

What readers usually find

Two patterns show up again and again. The first is that the question is loudest in the gap between one part of the day and the next, when there is nothing to hold attention: the walk to the bus, the last ten minutes before sleep, the moment the front door closes behind you.

The second is that people asking this are often keeping a kind of watch, and the watch is exhausting in a quiet way that does not look like anything from outside. If that is where you are, does he miss me covers the evening version of it, and the Two of Swords page is about the exact posture of sitting still with your eyes covered while you wait for something to be decided elsewhere.

Is he thinking about me during no contact?

The no contact version is the one people ask hardest, because there is a decision underneath it: whether to hold the silence or break it. The honest position has not moved. Nobody can see into somebody else’s week, and the length of a silence tells you nothing about what is happening inside it.

What can be said is that the person who did not choose the silence usually spends more time in it. If he ended things, he had a head start on the thinking, and that difference is not a measure of who cared more.

If you want the longer version of this, with what the waiting costs and how to get through the evenings, there is a piece in the journal written for exactly that stretch.

What to do with it

Put something in the hour. Not something impressive, something with edges: a walk to the corner, a phone call to someone who talks a lot, a shower at an odd time. The point is not to distract yourself out of your feelings, it is to stop leaving a window open at the same time every day.

And if he does turn up in your thoughts tomorrow at the usual hour, that is allowed too. Nobody gets to schedule that part.